


stampede couldn't break my stride

by v0rfreude



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Bull Riding, Country AU, Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, M/M, Rodeo Competitions, There's going to be some - Freeform, but mostly it's just about some boys havin a good time and riding some horses, chan loves too much, yeehaw: the fic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-20
Updated: 2020-12-20
Packaged: 2021-03-10 20:00:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,784
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28192839
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/v0rfreude/pseuds/v0rfreude
Summary: The first time Chan sees Soonyoung running out of the diner, running late for a horse riding lesson, cheek smattered with the grease of breakfast food, he doesn't imagine himself running after him. That leaves him with some serious catching up to do. Luckily, Chan is an expert in falling fast and hard.
Relationships: Boo Seungkwan/Chwe Hansol | Vernon, Kim Mingyu/Lee Seokmin | DK, Kwon Soonyoung | Hoshi/Lee Chan | Dino
Comments: 3
Kudos: 15
Collections: Match Point: The SEVENTEEN Sports Fic Fest





	stampede couldn't break my stride

**Author's Note:**

  * In response to a prompt by Anonymous in the [SVTSportsFest](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/SVTSportsFest) collection. 



> **Prompt:**
> 
> Chan had a vague understanding about rodeos and horse shows, which becomes a little clearer when his friend Hansol drags him to the rodeo every year when he visits him. Chan definitely remembers Seungkwan talking to Hansol about the dream of riding off into the sunset with someone on horseback, but he certainly never expected that to be him. Or that the person he'd be riding into the sunset with would be former rodeo cowboy turned equestrian trainer Kwon Soonyoung.
> 
> (A glimpse into the professional world of equestrian training and rodeos and horse-related sports would be AMAZING, but so would glimpses into life behind the scenes and adjacent to those sports.)
> 
> \---
> 
> The title is taken from a line from Legends Never Die by Orville Peck
> 
> First I would like to say thank you to the mods for being very patient with me. I've had a rough go of things lately, and they were very kind about giving me extra time to get my shit sorted out. I'll be forever grateful.
> 
> On the topic of gratefulness, I would like to extend that to everyone I had read this in the beginning stages, who encouraged me to keep going and gave me nudges in the right direction. Lars, Ria, Kim, Henry, Dylan, Hannah, thank you all so much. Your friendship and guidance is everything to me. At the risk of getting any more sappy, I'll let you know that despite all of those reader this hasn't been beta'd for grammar or anything, just for content. But I hope you'll enjoy despite any short comings this story may have.

_Perhaps we only leave_

_So we may once again arrive,_

_To get a bird’s eye view_

_Of what it means to be alive._

_For there is beauty in returning,_

_Oh how wonderful, how strange,_

_To see that everything is different_

_But know it’s only you who’s changed._

_— Returning,_ Erin Hanson

Every summer, Chan comes back home hopeful, feeling renewed when he sees his friends, family. So when it comes time to leave the city for the last time the summer after he graduates, he has mixed feelings. On one hand, moving back in with his parents for the foreseeable future feels like a loss, and on the other it will be nice to relax after fast tracking the nursing program. It also feels like a loss to be leaving his friends here, the ones that are either from the city or, are choosing to stay here. 

Chan wishes he could stay, but he misses his family too much for that, misses his friends and the quiet warm nights. There are warm nights here too, his friends who fill this space every Saturday with it and laughter and alcohol. The same ones who help him clean on Sunday morning and make greasy breakfasts to combat the hangovers. Looking at it now, boxes all stacked in one corner to be moved back later this week, it doesn’t feel like home anymore even though that’s what he’d come to call it.

Last night Jeonghan, Joshua and Yeri came to say their farewells. This morning the woman from downstairs, who says he’s still too skinny, brought a big plate of cookies—still warm—to take with him on the journey. It all feels like a little too much, and Chan ends up crying despite himself. Even as he arrives at the train station, he feels ragged with it.

On the train the familiar scenery passes by quickly with the companionship of cookies and the near constant pinging of his group chats- one with his college friends and one with his high school friends. One for saying how much he’s missing home, and one for saying how much he’s looking forward to being back.

\---

The train arrives at the nearest station to town after six hours, and Chan has been waiting at the side of the road for over an hour. It’s the beginning of June and summer is starting to settle its golden mantle over the countryside. Of course Chan had chosen today to wear a black shirt and jeans. In short, it’s hotter than an oven here in the open and Chan is sweating just standing still. 

Out here by the station it’s a little more populated, more like a tiny city and less like the endless oceans of soybeans, corn, and wheat of home. He wipes the sweat off his brow and looks out over the cars once again for Vernon’s older-than-him-or-any-of-their-friends Geo Tracker. It’s impossible to miss, and it’s definitely not here.

Sighing, Chan finally gives up and calls Vernon who answers on the second ring.

“Hey! I am _so_ sorry,” He says before Chan even has a chance to say anything. “ _Seungkwan_ took an _hour_ to get ready.”

“I did not! If you didn’t insist on driving a car that doesn’t go over sixty-five!”

Chan can’t help but laugh. He has missed his friends so much, the ache acting up not that they are so close. “Are you almost here at least?”

“We’re pulling in now!” Chan can hear the grin in his voice, and then even sees it from afar as the purple car pulls in. “Do you see us?”

“Yes!” Chan cheers, excitement sparking in his chest finally enough to soothe the stinging. He starts waving wildly as they drive towards him, jumping up and down when they park. It’s like he’d forgotten how much he’d missed them. 

Seungkwan jumps out before it’s even in park, throwing his arms around Chan and picking him up. “Chan! You’ve been gone forever.” He shakes him when he puts him back down, nearly knocking the wind out of him. “I think you grew while you were gone.” Seungkwan huffs, stepping back.

“Please, you saw me during Christmas.” Chan laughs, rolling his eyes while he pulls Vernon into a hug. 

“That was months ago, Chan.” Vernon laughs good-naturedly, but Chan can hear the slight tinge of disappointment. “It wouldn’t hurt you to come down more often and spend some time.”

Chan frowns, guilt settling heavy on his shoulders. He’s wanted to come home more than anything, but before that he’s had to focus hard on studying, to make his parents proud and to keep up with his scholarship and studies. “Six hours by train is long and expensive, okay? And then it’s two more by car. It’s just a lot.” He sighs while Vernon puts his suitcase in the back of the tracker.

“Yeah, well,” Seungkwan sniffs, punching him in the arm. “You’re the one who had to go so far.”

Chan just rolls his eyes, he’s always wanted to try living in a city, to see what kind of person he would be in a totally different setting. School just seemed like the perfect opportunity. It just so happens that the nearest big city with a good college is that far away. “I just wanted to figure out who I was away from here.” He says, shoving Seungkwan. “Can we get back on the road? I’m gonna’ combust.”

“Shotgun!” Seungkwan calls, as if Chan has ever tried to take the front seat away from him anyway.

\---

On the car ride home, the conversation is typical of not having seen friends in a while. Vernon and Seungkwan grill Chan about the city and his classes and his _new friends_ (said as if it were a dirty word). The melodic twang of guitar coming from the radio reminds him that things here stay pretty constant. It’s not that they haven’t grown, it’s just that they’ve grown in different ways—corn stalks and vining tomatoes. He’s just hit with how nostalgic it is to be in Vernon’s car listening to the same 90’s country they’ve been listening to since they figured out how to burn CD’s. Chan still knows every word of the country song playing. 

They pass rows and rows of fields, the sun shining through the window enough to combat the surprisingly cold air coming from Vernon’s a.c.. Meanwhile, Vernon and Seungkwan take turns filling him in on recent (and not-so-recent) events in town. A couple of new guys moved in, they’re chasing rodeo fame. Old man Park finally died, and his daughter sold off the property without a second thought- said she was never gonna come back if it killed her. Chan can relate to that, although here he is.

The most exciting news is that they did get a Starbucks finally, right on the edge of town where there’s the only highway ramp for miles. At least Chan will have a place to go that reminds him of being back in the city.

“You know, I don’t see the hype.” Vernon shrugs, eying Chan in the backseat. “The coffee’s not really that great.”

“I liked it.” Seungkwan announces.

“I know, you go there about every other day.” 

Chan laughs leaning his head against the window. “You don’t go to Starbucks for the coffee- it’s really not _that good_ \- you go because it’s a good place for ambient noise.”

Seungkwan looks back at him like he’s crazy. “What does that even _mean?_ ” He laughs, “You _have_ changed.”

Chan can feel the heat crawling up the back of his neck. He doesn’t think he’s changed _that_ much. He still likes video games and hearty home cooked meals. He still sings while he’s brushing his teeth and he definitely still hates spiders. Of course, he can’t tell Seungkwan all of that. Instead he rolls his eyes. “What does _that_ even mean?” He shoots back, shoving the back of his seat. 

Before Seungkwan can respond, a huge red truck speeds up behind them and honks. Chan turns back to look at the guy who’s hanging out the window, waving like a maniac. “What the hell is his problem?”

Vernon laughs good naturedly and waves back. “That’s Kim Mingyu. He’s one of the guys that moved in that we were telling you about.”

With only the recklessness that comes with a narrow country road that doesn’t see much traffic, Kim Mingyu pulls up beside them about five miles outside of town with one hand out the window and the other barely on the wheel. His passenger window is already down and the guy sitting shotgun leans out, motioning for Vernon to roll down his window. Vernon does, laughing. “Hey Seokmin.”

“Vernon! Where are y’all headed?” Seokmin’s smile beams brighter than the sun that beats down on his tanned arm which hangs freely out of the window.

“We just picked up Chan, you know our best friend from grade-school I’ve been telling you about.”

“Oh yeah?” Seokmin peers into the backseat while Chan leans forward to give a little wave.

“Hi there! I’m Lee Seokmin, and this is Kim Mingyu.” He leans back to show off Mingyu even though Chan can’t really see him across the truck.

“Car.” Vernon calls. On cue, Mingyu guns it to get around Vernon and drive in front of them while a car comes from the other direction. When it’s passed, Mingyu slows down and gets beside Vernon again.

“So where are you guys goin’ now?”

“I figured we would stop in the diner. Chan’s mom works there and I kind of figured we were all hungry.”

“You figured right,” Seungkwan groans, sliding down in his seat. 

Another wave of nostalgia hits Chan like a warm shower. He thinks of his younger days, of his mom coming home in her mint green uniform dress smelling like coffee and that day’s special. She always brought goodies home, pancakes, hash browns, bacon- it’s probably why he’s so fond of breakfast food.

“Ah great! We’ll see you there then?” Seokmin looks at Mingyu and then back at Vernon. “I want to meet _the_ Lee Chan.”

“Sounds good.” Vernon barely has the words out of his mouth than Mingyu is speeding away, his old red truck going impressively fast as it rumbles its way down the road.

“You talk about me that much, huh?” Chan asks, the tips of his ears hot.

“Well, us and your mom and dad.” Seungkwan answers, smiling fondly. “It’s not every day someone from around here goes full scholarship to a city college y’know.” 

“Yeah,” Vernon grins, “ _Some_ of us are barely passing community college.”

“Shut up! It was one class.” Seungkwan whines, punching Vernon’s arm.

Suddenly, Chan feels a little bit sad at not being able to share his college experience with them, the wonder of exploring a new city, of always having something to do—somewhere to go. He chews his lip, quietly taking in the countryside as Vernon and Seungkwan continue to bicker. The setting sun lights up a field of hay, green turning to gold in shimmering waves, and a strange surge of sadness wedges itself under Chan’s ribs. It’s a bittersweet ache he can’t quite place or put a name to, but hurts nonetheless.

\---

Pulling up in front of the diner is always surreal, the yellow and pink neon sign still buzzing over the white and blue walls. It’s not that he hasn’t been here in so long, but that having graduated it’s like he’s seeing it in a different light, from a new part of his life. The diner itself looks like it’s from a different time, but he’s always known it to look like that.

They park next to Mingyu’s truck in the gravel parking lot. The two of them hopping out of the truck as Chan and the other two pile out of Vernon’s car. “Hey! Chan!” Seokmin wraps him in a hug before Chan can even look at him. “It’s good to meet you, finally. These two don’t shut up about you.”

Chan blinks at him, then rolls his eyes with a laugh. “I’m sure it’s nothing good.” He smiles and earns the brightest smile he’s ever seen in return. Seokmin is beautiful, the kind of bone structure you would see on a model. Chan turns to shake hands with Mingyu and realizes that, aside from a crooked nose that looks like it was broken and never set right, he’s also model quality. The kind of people he would see walking down the street of the city in high fashion. Instead, they’re both wearing dirty plaid button ups and dusty jeans with boots.

“You guys work on a farm?” Chan asks, motioning vaguely.

“ _I_ work on a farm,” Mingyu grins, cute and sharp like a puppy. “Seokmin sits mostly.”

“Liar! I do all the hard work!” Seokmin shoves Mingyu who goes running, trailing laughter. It doesn’t take Seokmin long to catch up, wrapping his arm around Mingyu’s neck and trying to pull him down.

“Um…” Chan blinks helplessly, wondering if he should be concerned.

“Don’t worry.” Seungkwan laughs while they head to the door. “They’re always like this.”

“Good to know.” Chan smiles, opening the door for everyone before crowding in behind them. They don’t wait to be seated like the sign says, the diner is mostly empty aside from some old timers anyways. They head straight to the corner booth and crowd in except for Chan who gets grabbed from behind. 

“My baby!” His mother cheers, spinning him around and planting kisses all over his face. “You’re home, it’s so good to finally have you back!” She cries, squeezing him tight one more time before letting him go. Aside from the gray streaks starting to sneak into her carefully pinned chignon, she hasn’t changed from since he was little. She even smells the same, her slight floral perfume mixed with today’s special and coffee. It’s only been six months since he last saw her, but she acts like it’s been years, tears streaking her makeup. 

“Ah, mom, don't cry. I’m here, I’m really here.” Chan says gently, though he’s also tearing up, taking her face in his hands and pressing their foreheads together. She smiles at this, putting her hands over his. His heart throbs in his chest, he missed her, missed _this_ so much.

“I’m so happy to see you.” With that, she releases him, dusting off her uniform casually and pulling out the little book she uses to take orders. “Now,” She clears her throat, eyes still sparkling. “What can I get you boys?” 

They go down the line, repeating orders she’s no doubt heard several hundred times. Chan has been getting the same chocolate chip pancakes from the diner since before he could talk. “Alright, I’ll get that right in!” 

Before she can turn around, there’s a guy rushing out of the kitchen, untying his apron while he goes. “Bye Mrs. Lee!” He gives her a kiss on the cheek and a half hug. Chan has half a notion to get up and ask him what his deal is, jealousy warm in the pit of his stomach that this guy acts so familiar with his mom when Chan’s hardly gotten to see her at all in the past four years. “I’ll see you… Tomorrow? Yes? Okay!”

“Soonyoung!” Vernon calls after him. “Wait! Hang out with us!” 

“Can’t!” The so-called Soonyoung is walking backwards now, grinning until his eyes disappear. “I have a lesson to teach in… Oh hell, I’m gonna be late. Bye now!” The bell above the door jingles as he makes his exit.

Chan doesn’t realize he’s pouting until Seungkwan elbows him. “She hasn’t replaced you, dummy. Soonyoung just has that way about him.”

“Well, he should have that way about him with his own mom.” Chan pouts, stirring the ice in his water.

“He’s a good guy- workaholic.” Vernon smiles. “You’ll get to meet him sometime I’m sure, actually probably this saturday we were planning on getting together.”

They slip into easier conversation after that. Chan learns that Mingyu and Seokmin work on the largest dairy farm this side of the county border. Seokmin occasionally writes papers for an agricultural journal, and is apparently much smarter than Chan originally gave him credit for, already graduated from college with a veterinary sciences degree. Mingyu is a highschool dropout, but makes up for it in wit and easy charisma. This is how they get to the topic of the rodeo.

“It’s a lucrative hustle-”

“Side hustle.” Seokmin interrupts, frowning. “ _If_ you win, and don’t die.”

Mingyu rolls his eyes, leaning back. “Nobody’s dying. And when I do win most of my rides this season, I’ll get into a bigger circuit.” Seokmin’s jaw tightens and Chan can sense that this is a conversation they’ve had many times in quieter places. Mingyu smiles good naturedly, trying to ease the tension, his large hand landing on Seokmin’s shoulder and squeezing. “You’ll change your tune when your _best friend_ is rich.”

A sigh forces itself out of Seokmin’s lips. “I have to take care of you until then, make sure you don’t get brain damage from some bull.” He shoves a bite of egg into his mouth, pouting, but mostly placated.

Chan’s been to the rodeo a few times with Vernon and Seungkwan when they were younger and Seungkwan went through that phase where he was obsessed with horseback riding- convinced that one day he would ride off happily into the sunset. Apart from that, he’s gone a few sparing times in the summers he spent at home during college, but it’s been a while to say the least. “You actually really like bull riding?” He asks Mingyu, intrigued.

“What can I say? It’s a big adrenaline rush.” He grins. “It’s not all bull riding though. Seokmin acts like he hates it, but he used to be pretty big into barrel racing. He and Soonyoung, the guy that just left, used to be pretty fierce rivals.”

Chan doesn’t miss the way Seokmin quietly elbows Mingyu in the ribs. “Why don’t you do it anymore?” He asks, curiosity getting the better of him. There’s a new strange sort of tension when he asks. He looks between Seungkwan and Vernon for guidance, but they both just give him a hard to read expression- a mixture of pity and something else.

“I don’t want to anymore.” Seokmin says quietly, pushing his food around.

Chan bites his lip. “I’m sorry for asking, I didn’t know it was—”

“It’s alright, you didn’t know.” Seokmin smiles softly at Chan, patting his hand. 

Frowning, Chan nods, the back of his neck burning with embarrassment, he didn’t mean to make anyone feel bad. “I understand.”

Under the warm glow of the diner lamps above them, Mingyu looks sheepish, red staining the tips of his ears. “Anyways,” He clears his throat. “You should come out and experience it for yourself. They have novice bull riding in between main events sometimes.” Mingyu grins, raising his eyebrows.

Chan laughs at that, trying to imagine himself on a bull and only imagining some broken ribs and broken nose to match Mingyu’s. “Thanks, but I’ll pass.”

\---

After they leave the diner, hugs all around from his mother and _I'll be back by five_ , Vernon drives Chan back to his house down old state route 17 and turns right onto a long gravel driveway past fields of just sprouting corn that will turn vibrant and green and tall in the coming months. The farmhouse feels smaller now, than even a handful of months ago, the steps up to the wrap around porch infinitely less somehow. He looks up to the window of his bedroom, green paint peeling on the shutters, a breeze shifting the curtains. He smiles privately to himself. 

“Well, we’re home.” Seungkwan grins, turning back to look at Chan. 

They help him move his bags upstairs, stopping to say hi to his father and brother before they leave him to decompress. His father meets him with praise, and congratulations again for graduating college early. Gun meets him with excited chatter about his first year at college, it’s closer, only about a twenty minute drive from home, and even though their parents had pushed for Gun to get on campus housing, he decided to stay home in the end.

Chan wonders vaguely if he had anything to do with that decision, maybe Gun thought their parents needed someone to take care of, someone to take care of them. “What’s wrong? You’re not very talkative.” Gun claps him on the back, watching him unpack his clothes more than he is helping.

“It’s just weird.” Chan says, stuffing his jeans into his empty dresser.

“What is?” 

It’s not like he expects Gun or anyone who has settled here to understand, that he carved out a place for himself just to leave it and come back here where it feels like things never change. He feels simultaneously like he’s moving backwards and forwards, a ship at sea, motion sick. “I just never thought moving back would be this hard.” He scuffs a bare foot against the wooden floor and shrugs.

“It’s okay, you still have time to make something of yourself.” Gun elbows him in the ribs, which turns into Chan shoving him, teasing each other while tackling one another to the floor and rough housing until Gun smacks his head against the leg of the bed frame and shoves Chan off of him into the dresser.

“Boys! Knock it off!” Their father calls from the foot of the stairs. “Come help me do some chores!”

\---

Settling back at home is surprisingly easy, and Chan finds himself falling into old habits immediately. He wakes up early, like his mother, has coffee with her before she leaves in her old Honda Civic for work. After, he walks their old shepherd dog, Dino, down the long gravel drive and back up. For lunch, he borrows his father’s old work truck and visits Seungkwan at the local drive-in fast food joint where he’s worked since he turned sixteen. He begs Seungkwan to use his discount for a peanut butter shake and a large fry, and sits happily in the bed of the truck after he gives in, watching him run from car to car to take and bring orders. 

When he gets off work, Chan drives him to the mechanic shop where Venon works since he’s been blowing up their phones complaining about how bored he is. Despite that, when they arrive, he’s covered in grease and sweat and has obviously been working hard. They watch him do a final oil change, mostly talking amongst themselves and laughing when Vernon chimes in from under the car.

Like it often does in small towns, time moves like this, syrupy, and much the same. Every day blurs into one another, the only real change is when Vernon and Seungkwan’s work shifts are, and when Seungkwan blows them off because he has online summer classes. 

The week passes in such a blur that Chan forgets about Saturday. He’s in bed reading a book, headphones in when neon strobing colors the walls in his room with pink, purple, blue, green, yellow. He removes a headphone, squinting over at the window. 

“Channie,” His mother calls from the bottom of the stairs, “Were you expecting company?”

“Uhh,” Chan doesn’t really have a chance to respond before he hears Seungkwan’s voice from outside. 

“Chan! Are you ready to go? I tried calling you _twice_! Get out here!” 

Chan goes to his window and peers out. Sure enough there’s Seungkwan standing in the bed of a silver, lifted truck, country music blasting out of the open windows and the source of the neon in his room are the lights that flash under it. He throws open his bedroom window, laughing. “Uhm, I’ll be right there.” He calls back before retreating into his room to get dressed. 

Chan picks up a plaid flannel shirt, thinks better of it, like maybe that makes him too much of a try hard. He settles on a plain black tee and some old work boots. The sun is turning orange, sinking in the sky when he kisses his mother goodnight with a promise to be back though he’s not quite sure when. 

“That’s alright,” She assures, “Just have fun and be safe.”

“I will.” Chan grins and runs out the door when he hears honking. 

“Get in! We’re gonna be late!” Seungkwan yells, sitting back in his spot next to Vernon and giggling wildly at the raucous singing coming from inside the cab of the truck. 

Chan doesn’t even really get to absorb the sight of the eyesore of a truck, brand new by the look of it with the tacky neons underneath lifted tires. He hops over the tailgate and comes face to face with his very first high school crush Choi Seungcheol. 

“Hey, if it isn’t Lee Chan!” He grins, holding his hand out for a shake.

“Choi?” They played football together in high school, Chan had taken his place as starting quarterback when Seungcheol graduated. Before that, Chan had spent long hours staring at his long eyelashes in AP chemistry class and then even more when he ended up tutoring him before the final exam. “Hey, it’s good to see you.” He shakes his hand firmly, jostling when the truck begins moving. 

“Likewise.” Seungcheol grins, pulling one leg up to rest an arm on. “Staying out of trouble?” 

“As much as I can.” Chan shrugs one shoulder, laughing when Seungkwan elbows him.

“Channie graduated _early_.” He says in way of explanation. 

“Oh? No shit! You always were so smart.” Seungcheol reaches across and claps him on the shoulder. “And of course you remember Wonwoo and Jihoon?” He motions to the cab of the truck where the back window is open and a pair of familiar circular glasses turns to look out. in the middle of the bench seat, another familiar face turns and offers an easy smile. 

“Oh my god, yes! Hey!” Chan waves, blinking at the feeling of how strange it is to be meeting up with people he kind of doubted he would see again. Wonwoo was Seungcheol’s best friend through high school though he was known for being bookish—everyone had assumed it was because of him that Seungcheol never actually flunked out—but he was also famous because once he got into track junior year, he broke damn near every record there was for long distance running. Jihoon, Chan remembers less of, he was always the sort of quiet intimidating that seemed unapproachable. But here in the lowlight coming from the dash, he seems at ease, arms along the back of the seat.

“Hey, Chan.” Jihoon says easily, wiggling his fingers. 

“Jihoonie’s already been drinking.” The man driving, who Chan doesn’t recognize, sings, bumping his elbow into Jihoon’s ribs. “Hi. I’m Wen Junhui.” He grins, meeting Chan’s eyes in the rearview.

“Jun owns this horrible vehicle.” Seungkwan grins, hanging his head back so his hair flutters in the wind. 

“ _Hey_ ,” Jun whines. “You can’t even knock it, you don’t even have a license.”

Vernon laughs at that, ruffling Seungkwan’s hair. “Sorry, Kwannie, that’s true.”

“Sorry, Jun, it is sort of monstrous.” Seungcheol concedes, laughingly.

“You guys can walk!” 

The whole truck breaks into laughter, sending warmth through Chan. He smiles, following Seungkwan’s lead and hanging his head back. 

Jihoon’s cackling dies out at the beginning of the next song and he sits forward. “Ooh, I love this song!” He cranks the volume and it’s a song Chan’s also familiar with, and when everyone starts shouting the lyrics, Chan does too, singing his heart out for the audience of crickets and the fields that rise and fall around them as they drive through the countryside on backroads with the sun setting behind them. 

  
  


\---

After probably forty-five minutes of driving, they end up turning down a gravel road that dead ends at a huge barn, rows and rows of cars parked in the grassy field beside it. It’s a different barn from the one Chan remembers going to when they were younger and just looking for something to do. The barn is much more done-up, banners for sponsorships and a lot more trailers lining the back. 

The smell of hay and grass is strong, the warmth of day seeping from the ground spreading the scent like perfume. When Jun parks the truck, Chan hops out of the back with Vernon and Seungkwan right behind him. “Let’s get a good seat, and I’ll get us some drinks before the excitement starts.” Vernon grins, an arm looped around Seungkwan’s shoulders and through Chan’s arm. 

“What about them?” Chan looks back where the others are still milling about the truck. 

Seungkwan smiles, leaning around Vernon. “They’ll be around. Jihoon usually stays in the stables, but Jun and Wonwoo will be here to drive us when it’s over, and Seungcheol, well he’s probably off to find his girlfriend anyways.” He giggles, wiggling his eyebrows.

The barn is loud with the crowd lining the bleachers and standing around the wooden fenced corral in the middle, and there’s a constant thrum of guitar to halo all of it. It’s exciting and alien to Chan all at once. He follows Seungkwan to the bleachers where they watch Vernon walk off to the long line at the concession stand. “We’ve been coming here since a little after you went off to college. It’s how we reconnected with Seungcheol and Wonwoo—not that they were ever far.” Seungkwan laughs, leaning back with his legs out on the next bleacher down. “I’m glad you’re here now, Chan. It didn’t feel the same without you.”

Chan looks at him with warmth in his cheeks and heart. “Thanks Seungkwannie, I missed you too.” 

“Alright. Stop being sappy.” Another laugh and an elbow to Chan’s side later, Seungkwan points over to someone walking through the door, a grin on his face that swallows his eyes.

Kwon Soonyoung walks into the barn like there's nowhere else in the world he belongs, and though Chan's never _really_ met him before, he already has a sense for what kind of person Soonyoung really is. Despite the slight noticeable catch in his gait, his open confidence sets him apart from everyone else, the way he comes over and immediately puts his arm around Chan while he takes a seat on the bleachers next to him is so familiar, like an old friend. "Oh, it’s just you guys." He puts his hand in Chan's and shakes it for him. "I'm Kwon Soonyoung, I didn't have a chance to meet you the other day at the diner. I was rushing to a lesson."

"Uh, that's okay, I'm Lee Chan." He smiles back, and is surprised when it comes easy despite his initial impression.

"Lee Chan? Like Mrs.Lee's, _Lee Chan_?"

"That's the one." Seungkwan grins, coming down a bleacher to sit a row ahead of them, leaning around Chan to grin back at him. “He’s a baby.”

“Oh yeah?” Soonyoung coos.

Chan leans back so that they’re cooing in each other’s faces and groans. “Stop it!” He mutters, red rising in his cheeks. Soonyoung ruffles his hair, still grinning so hard his eyes turn upwards, and it’s not hard to see why people gravitate towards Soonyoung so much. He exudes a warmth like a little ball of sunshine has just centered itself in the barn.

Chan pulls his hand back and offers a tentative smile. "You're not riding tonight?" He asks Soonyoung, his head tilted. 

Soonyoung shakes his head. "Oh I—" He smiles, biting his bottom lip. "Nah, tonight's bull riding only. We'll get to see Mingyu ride though, and Wonwoo."

"Wonwoo?" Chan asks, his eyebrows scrunched together. "Wonwoo rides?" He raises his eyebrows, looking between Seungkwan and Soonyoung. He’d never taken Wonwoo for someone who did things for an adrenaline rush.

"Right?" Soonyoung says, giddy. “I never saw him riding a bull until, well, I saw him riding a bull.”

It's strange, knowing that Soonyoung knows about Chan's friends, his acquaintances, but Chan doesn't really know anything about him besides the fact that he rides horses or teaches people how to ride horses. "Yeah I went to school with him." Chan toes at the peeling paint of the wood bleacher his foot is resting on. "He was best friends with Choi Seungcheol, he was my senior football captain.”

"Oh no way?" Soonyoung giggles, "Do you know Seungcheol used to ride? Then he started dating Jihyo, and well, the rest is all history as they say." He points to where Seungcheol is leaning next to Park Jihyo, a girl he only recognizes because she was captain of the cheer team. But Chan doesn't think he's ever spoken to her a single time, he remembers hearing about her rejecting someone from the team once, how she had let him down easy, but the way she had looked at him had apparently _made his balls recede back into his body_.

Seungcheol waves to them like he has supersonic hearing, and perks up when he sees Soonyoung, recognizing him with a bright smile. He points to Chan next, pulling at Jihyo's plaid shirt. They walk hand in hand towards them just as Vernon comes back with four beers cradled in his arms. He grins at Seungcheol. "Hey! If I knew you were gonna join us again, I would have gotten more."

"That's okay, there'll be plenty more at Signal later, right?"

Signal Saloon is notorious for its wild parties, and bar fights. It’s not exactly a place Chan ever saw himself going. When Vernon agrees, Chan lifts an eyebrow. “You guys are going to _Signal_ now?”

“It’s under new management.” Jihyo pipes up, crossing her arms across her chest and grinning. “It’s not the shithole it used to be.”

“That’s right. We fixed it up, made it the place to be.” Seungcheol slings an arm around her waist, but she dodges a kiss, scrunching up her nose.

“ _We?_ ” She laughs, poking his chest. “And _who_ operated all the power tools?”

Seungcheol concedes right as the announcer begins by thanking them for coming out tonight. As with most small town ceremony, it starts with the national anthem, everyone standing in tandem to remove their hats and face the flag. Chan feels strangely like he's back in High School when he puts his hand half-heartedly over his chest and finds himself drawn from the flag hanging down in the middle of the barn, away from the two girls dressed to their country nines who sing perfectly beautifully, and to the shape of Soonyoung's profile and the way his mouth forms the lyrics of the song.

Chan reprimands himself before his heart hits the ground running. He reminds himself that this living situation is temporary. That this summer is _temporary_. There will be no crushes. No making this more difficult than it has to be when it comes time to leave town.

Then the song ends and Soonyoung turns to him beaming. "Do you not know the national anthem?" He laughs loud and easy and teasing.

So much for no crushes.

\---

It turns out bull riding is much more panic inducing than Chan originally thought. Every time someone is thrown from the back of a bull, Chan finds himself gasping along with the rest of the crowd, and even once standing up to assess the situation and make sure the rider's okay.

He's two beers in and feeling a little light headed when he spots Seokmin by the ready rider bullpen, patting a heavily padded form that's too big to be anyone but Mingyu on the shoulder as he straps himself in. Chan watches intensely while Mingyu's announced, and a buzzer sounds as the gate is released. It feels like the longest eight seconds of Chan's life. He doesn't even realize how tense he is until Soonyoung's hand comes to rest on top of Chan's tightly balled fist.

"Relax," Soonyoung leans over to him, his voice soft and clear despite the noise around them. "Mingyu's been riding for a long time. He can handle himself."

"Yeah Mingyu!" Seungkwan yells, both fists thrust into the air.

Seungcheol laughs and yells in agreement, "That's my boy!"

But Mingyu needs no encouragement to show how experienced he is, he sails over the 8 second mark and bails off of the back of the bull as gracefully as he can manage and deftly hops the fence when the bull runs back towards him. And the crowd erupts, Chan stands along with the rest of his friends, cheering wildly and pointing to Mingyu who’s had the best ride of the night so far.

They applaud him even as he and Seokmin round the corner to join them and watch the rest of the riders. Seungkwan hollers, pulls Mingyu into his arms and continues cheering excitedly.

“Alright, alright.” Mingyu laughs and takes a beer from Seokmin’s hand. “I think Wonwoo’s up soon. We’ll see if I still got a leg to stand on then.”

“Oh shush.” Seokmin smiles easily and shrugs a shoulder before taking a sip of his own beer. “You did great.”

Soonyoung turns to Chan at that, elbowing him and giggling as he wraps his arms around himself to mime making out with himself. Chan doesn’t laugh until he’s made such a spectacle of himself that Seokmin smacks his leg and laughs too. In turn, Soonyoung shushes Seokmin when Wonwoo’s name is announced.

“That’s my best friend!” Soonyoung yells, waving towards the bullpen. Wonwoo doesn’t even look at him, his eyes focus ahead at the bull, then skyward when he makes the sign of the cross with his free hand. 

The buzzer sounds and the bull rockets out of the gate, doing its best to buck and kick Wonwoo off. To his credit, Wonwoo hangs on the whole eight seconds, but as Seungkwan leans back to explain, he’s going to lose points for struggling to hang on. Wonwoo, Jun and Jihoon return to join their group as well, Wonwoo looking slightly disappointed despite their just as enthusiastic cheers.

“You rode well.” Mingyu smiles sympathetically.

“Not as well as you.” Wonwoo wrinkles his nose and sits down next to Mingyu with Jun beside him and Jihoon in front of them, laughing drunkenly at something only he knows. 

“Wonwoo’s being nice, he was cursing at you all up and down the barn.” Jihoon finally divulges, letting the rest of them in to share in his laughter. 

The rest of the rodeo passes like this, with shared laughter and even more shared alcohol. Enough that Jun and Jihyo are the only two sober ones and have to figure out the best way to divide up ten people between Jun’s truck and Jihyo’s Yaris.

“Are we still going to Signal?” Chan asks privately to Vernon as they’re once again shepherded into the back of Jun’s truck- marked as some of the less drunk of the bunch. 

“Yeah, is that okay?”

Chan nods, then looks over his shoulder, catching sight of Soonyoung who is pushing Seokmin into the back of Jihyo’s car. “Is Soonyoung coming?” He turns back to Vernon, head tilted like a curious child.

Vernon laughs and nods. “Yeah, it’s tradition.”

“Tradition.” Chan repeats, smiling when he climbs into the bed of the truck after Vernon.

\---

The group of them arrive at Signal Saloon in varying shades of drunkenness. Chan is loosened up enough that the familiar country song playing over the jukebox comes easily and loudly to his mouth. He leans on Seungkwan who leans in turn on Vernon and laughs at the way Seungkwan is also crooning, a little more worse for wear than Chan. 

“I’ll get us a table.” Soonyoung grins when he walks in ahead of them, pointing them in the direction of the bar. “I’ll have a Pabst.” He directs to Chan who’s spent just a fraction of a moment too long staring at the curve of his neck where it disappears into his flannel. He didn’t mean to get this tipsy and he definitely didn’t mean to keep coming back to the thought of Soonyoung smiling when he finally got Chan to laugh at his stupid jokes.

“Are you asking me to buy you a drink?” Chan asks boldly, his eyes refocusing back on Soonyoung’s face.

Soonyoung for his part seems a little embarrassed, his cheeks reddening under the neon glow of the beer sign covered wooden walls. “Yeah, I guess I am.”

Chan grins wider. His brain feels like melting. “Okay. I’ll see what I can do.” He walks up to the bar and is surprised to find Jihyo already behind it, grinning. 

“You boys thirsty?” She asks, soda gun in one hand, tumbler in the other.

“Yes please!” Seungkwan cheers. And so they are set up with more drinks than the three of them have hands and Chan finds himself balancing a serving tray as he carefully navigates the dancefloor where people are chanting lyrics to the sound of stomping boots as they dance in lines and sometimes couples to songs that are both familiar and unfamiliar to Chan in turns. 

When Chan miraculously makes it back to the table without losing any of the drinks, he finds himself unable to look away from the dancefloor, enrapt at the way most of the dances know exactly what they’re doing- exactly what step comes next. Both Vernon and Seungkwan grab their drinks before running off to join the dancers, trailing laughter behind them. When he turns back to the table to take a drink of his own beer, Chan finds himself nearly nose to nose with Soonyoung. 

“You should get up and dance too.” He says, pointing to where Seungkwan and Vernon join Mingyu, Seokmin, Wonwoo and Jun all dancing in a line.

Chan smiles sheepishly. “I mean I grew up here, but honestly I don’t really know how.”

“You grew up out here in the sticks and don’t know how to line dance?” Soonyoung laughs, leaning around him to take a picture of the group of them doing the watermelon crawl. 

“And what about you?” Chan snorts. “You have two left feet?”

The smile Soonyoung aims in his direction wanes between beaming and hesitant. “Something like that.” He passes the beer can in his hand back and forth over the smooth wood table, wet with condensation, seeming to deliberate something internally. Idly, Chan watches him chew the inside of his lip, curious of what he might say. And Soonyoung meets his eyes again, opens his mouth once silently, then again, this time to speak. “I can teach you.”

That piques Chan’s interest, his eyes going alight. “You mean it?”

Soonyoung deliberates for a moment more before nodding. “Sure, why not?” 

When they join the others on the dance floor, they are greeted with enthusiastic cheers. 

“Why, Kwon Soonyoung back in the game, I never thought I’d see the day.” Wonwoo smirks, half-heartedly mimicking the steps of the line dance.

Soonyoung rolls his eyes. “I told Chan I’d help him out.” 

And so the next song that comes on, Soonyoung grins and instructs Chan- right over left, three steps to the side, stomp your feet and turn around all slowly at first but then faster, put together to the tempo of the song. As they’re turning around, Soonyoung smiles. “There you go!” He encourages. “We’ll have to get you a pair of cowboy boots, it’s easier when you can hear the steps.”

Chan grins, he never expected himself to be excited about the prospect of wearing cowboy boots. In his days growing up here, he never wanted to embrace these things, it always seemed tacky and a little backwoods. Cowboy boots were for actual farmers and the trailer trash that tried to live up to that lifestyle. It was not for people who wanted to move to the city and go to medical school. But here, pleasantly drunk and watching the movement of Soonyoung’s own boots on the floor to keep up, it seems like the natural progression of things. 

Just as the natural progression is watching their friends pair off in smaller groups after a while of drinking. Just like Chan beginning to stumble over his feet- he forgets how many beers later- and letting himself be led back to the table where he writes his number on a half soggy bar napkin and gains Soonyoung’s in return.

They share a private smile. A moment of _I guess that means we’re friends now_ . And after another moment, Soonyoung lays his head on Chan’s shoulder, laughs in the quiet way one might when remembering something funny and says, “Shit, I’m _drunk._ ”

Chan laughs at that, nodding his head in agreement. The rest of the night past this fades into obscurity. There is only the buzz of alcohol in his temple and the warmth of Soonyoung’s head on his shoulder that mirrors the warmth in Chan’s belly—the always too much, head over heels emotion he feels when his brain latches onto an object of interest. Something that has burned him before in the past, especially here where the dating pool is your best friends- unlikely, they’re already so far engrossed in each other- and someone you hate or went to school with which is not mutually exclusive. He doesn’t even know if Soonyoung likes men, but he has daydreamed far richer tapestries with men he has known far less. At least Soonyoung seems to enjoy his company.

Chan smiles to himself privately. If it doesn’t pan out, they can at least be friends for the duration of Chan’s stay here, someone else to hang out with when Vernon is working and Seungkwan is in class. He turns his head to smile down at Soonyoung only to balk, “Are you _asleep?_ ”

Soonyoung’s eyelids flutter, a tiny laugh huffing out of him. “ _Sorry,_ ” He says, though he doesn’t sound sorry at all. “You’re comfortable.”

And Chan has to fight back the flame in himself that spreads until his fingers are tingling with the want to reach out. 

That night he does not remember how he gets home, or the song that was playing as they left. The only thing his brain holds onto is the way he didn’t have to reach out, Soonyoung’s hand found his and laced their fingers together before Chan even had a chance to register it, and the way freckles fall over his nose and how that close Chan could count every single one of them like constellations in the night sky.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you all so much for reading. The past few months have been very difficult for me, but the support and comments I've been left have fueled me through. Even if I don't reply, know that I read and appreciate every one of them. If you want to follow me and keep up with what I'm working on you can follow me here [here](https://twitter.com/armpitsjun). Thank you again, and look forward to seeing you all again very soon!


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